Turkey Awards!

Rules for the Chessiecon Turkey Award contest:

1. Entries shall be imagined as the worst possible opening to the worst possible SF/F novel (n)ever written. Contestants may make as many entries as desired, but each submission should be clearly delineated from others. Only one dubious prize will be awarded per entrant regardless of number of entries.
2. Each entry may consist of a single sentence or a paragraph not to exceed 80 words in length.
3. Each entry must be original work, and not previously published or entered into The Turkey Awards.
4. Entrants should strongly resist the temptation to work with puns based on Edward Bulwer-Lytton's famous opening to "Paul Clifford", ("It was a dark and stormy night...") or Jim Thies' "The Eye of Argon".
5. Entries may be made by e-mail or by surface mail. E-mail submissions should be made in the body of the message, not an attachment, and should be sent to: turkeys@chessiecon.org with the subject line of "Turkey Award Submission(s)". Surface mail submissions should be sent by post card or letter to: TSFS, Inc. PO Box 83032 Gaithersburg, MD 20883-3032 Attn: Turkey Award Submission(s). Entries should also be clearly marked with the entrant's name.
6. Contest entries will be presented and judged at a panel at Virtual Chessiecon 2020.
7. Contest judges are not eligible to win.
8. Dubious prizes will be awarded for 3rd-Worst, 2nd-Worst and Worst Place.
9. Deadline for entries will be 11/15/2020